Being a successful leader is about knowing how to manage, inspire, and encourage a vast majority of people with varying personalities. Leaders usually work with people who are easily managed, but there are other times when they鈥檙e faced with the challenge of how to lead difficult people.
Like any challenge, leading difficult people can become easier if the leader has a toolkit and plan of action prepared to handle the situation appropriately.
Today, we鈥檒l cover some of the best techniques to manage difficult people in ways that reduce friction and preserve morale. First, let鈥檚 dig into what makes a person 鈥渄ifficult.鈥�
Note before we begin: while we are focusing on employees here, leadership is found in all aspects of life, and difficult people can be found anywhere as well. These tips can be used in a multitude of situations.
While difficult people are one of those things where you 鈥渒now it when you see it,鈥� this type of thinking largely takes place after someone has already expressed toxic traits. A more helpful strategy is to understand the traits of a difficult person, which allows for early intervention.
According to the , there are 11 behaviors that difficult people often have, which include:
This list is a great way to quickly gain an understanding if someone is becoming problematic. claim there are seven core ingredients that make someone difficult inside and outside of the workplace. They include:
Obviously, people typically don鈥檛 fit inside neat boxes like these; however, understanding the common traits of a difficult person can help you identify them early and address the issue before it gets out of hand.
Now that you understand how to identify potentially problematic people, how should you lead them?
Leaders can employ a few different techniques and strategies to better manage and lead difficult people and, if done correctly, can even help people become easier to work with.
According to , one of the best ways to begin leading a difficult person is to understand the root cause of the problem. Most people don鈥檛 want to be viewed as difficult, meaning there is likely something going on that鈥檚 been overlooked.
For example, an employee may start expressing 鈥減roblematic鈥� behaviors because they have too much work on their plate, are unhappy with their current role, have issues outside of the workplace, or a myriad of other things that aren鈥檛 immediately apparent.
To shine a light on these potential problem areas, try to get a sense of the person on a deeper level. Sometimes simply addressing their concerns and making an action plan can turn things around.
Uncovering the root cause of these behaviors requires a leader to foster a culture of openness and transparency where problems are not pushed to the side. One of the best leadership styles for this is servant leadership, which hinges on putting the needs of others first and focuses on being an active listener.
Leading difficult people is a challenge in itself so don鈥檛 fall into the trap of .
You must remember the old adage that 鈥渢wo wrongs don鈥檛 make a right.鈥� When communicating with a difficult person, leave judgment, negativity, and finger-pointing out of the equation.
A good way to communicate openly without falling into these trappings is to listen before reacting. Leading a difficult person takes time and isn鈥檛 something that鈥檚 suddenly fixed after one interaction.
Other tips for making sure the communication process goes smoothly:
One of the biggest hurdles leaders face when dealing with a difficult person is knowing when to bring in additional support from other leaders, coworkers, friends, or anyone who may be able to lend assistance.
While this seems like a simple task, it鈥檚 more nuanced than you might think. There鈥檚 a delicate balance between discussing a difficult person and gossiping or complaining about them.
Gossip does nothing but and increases the likelihood of a toxic culture. To avoid that outcome, make sure the person you鈥檙e bringing in to help is trustworthy, compassionate, and not one to spread rumors about the difficult individual.
Here are a few tips to ensure you pick the right confidant for advice:
While deploying the tactics above have a high likelihood of making difficult people easier to manage and may solve the situation entirely, you have to know when enough is enough, especially when it comes to employees.
If all has failed, it鈥檚 time to escalate the problem to your manager or members of leadership. Though this may feel like giving up, it鈥檚 the only step available after a certain point. Remember, this is and should only be implemented if all other avenues have been exhausted or if the person鈥檚 behavior becomes dangerous.
Managing and leading difficult people is a unique challenge that requires care, compassion, and consideration. Each person and situation is unique and will require a different approach.
Remember that very few people start their day off intending to be difficult. There鈥檚 likely an internal reason for their negativity, and finding it can be the key to alleviating the situation.
Also, take a careful and deliberate approach to how you communicate. Stay calm, be mindful, and practice listening before reacting. If all fails, reach out to other leaders, friends, or family members to lean on their experiences.